Last week we learned from Rick Mercer that there are a few things in Ottawa which are being done in a less than perfect manner. Only a little, but not entirely perfect if you really look hard.

Let us move on from that for a moment and see what Pembroke, Ontario has to show for the up-coming non-holiday of Hallowe’en, shall we? This aired originally on the 21^st of October, 2009, and you will not believe the size of these gourds, nor the purpose to which some are employed afterwards.

As for me, at the time you’re reading this (no sooner than the 28^th of October, 2009), I’m probably screaming blue murder at my computer; or in the direction of Redmond, Washington; or – more probably – both. Why? Well, I anticipate that around that point in the life of this planet I’ll be installing the new version of Microsoft’s operating system: Windows 7, Professional. Why did I choose to upgrade from the 9-year-old Windows XP, Professional? Well, it seems like a good idea right now (Friday, the 23^rd of October), but it’s probably not a good idea to be asking me that question when you’re reading this as I may replace your lungs with a nice, shiny installation DVD with a nifty holographic image on one of its surfaces.

[for those of you wondering how Microsoft is promoting this OS in new and exciting ways – as well as way they might do so, if only they had a sense of humour – can check out E-Sarcasm’s coverage of Win7’s promotion]

How am I typing this on last Friday but you’re not reading it until the Wednesday following? Simple: I call it ‘MAGIC’!

Or, if you’re picky about it, “Scheduled, PHP-driven Publishing Using the WordPress Platform”. But that’s so maudlin, isn’t it?

Those of you who read the earlier paragraph about my anticipated struggles to simply install an Operating System (especially one which may not actually have any point to it replacing my current one), plus are tempted to mutter “psst! get a Mac!”, can either send me a couple of grand for some new hardware, plus the same again for some software that runs on the Mac OSX (because all my current stuff won’t); or you can merely shut your screech holes. Your choice, really. Thanks. Kisses, darling!

Sadly, Rick Mercer is not King of Canada. Hell, he’s not even King of Kensington! If he was the King of Kensington, he’d be dead, and then where would we be? Up a creek without a political satirist, that’s where we’d be!

What’s the point of all that? Very little, as usual.

The only purpose of that is to provide some sort of unique content before I simply paste in some HTML code from YouTube and act like I’m providing some sort of unique material you couldn’t have seen if you weren’t such a lazy bugger, got off your arse once in awhile, and dug through the Internet on your own!

Now here’s the video which originally aired on the 14^th October, 2009.

Oh, why not; here’s another one. It aired originally last Tuesday; the 21^st of October, 2009

Many of you — possibly 75% of you actually, are not sitting in the Dominion of Canada when reading this. Many of you still wonder ‘when I’ll be writing that book explaining Canada to foreigners?’ Well, after seeing things like this video from Rick Mercer I realise there isn’t any need to add to the material available. The man has the entire thing tapped (or ‘taped’, if you’re in the UK). Thankfully, I’ve just run across a post over at Tentative Equinox (happy belated Spring, by the way, oh belovèd TE)

The thing to remember here is that 99% of the things stated in this, which may seem at first glance to be a skit, are correct. Queen Elisabeth [hurrah!] is the titular Queen of Canada and holds that office when in the Dominion (so named because she has dominion over it and therefore us [hurrah!]), and the parliamentary democratic system of government we employ operates in exactly the way he explains. The election described is the one in October of last year which was held whilst I was in London (for a reaction to its results, go here to read the post¹).

Sometimes the strangest turn of events is more accurate than anything a writer of fiction might concoct on his best day following a morning reading in the British Library and stopping off for a double espresso on the way back to the keyboard.

The only thing better than this at explaining matters political is the introduction to “side two” of the Blues Brothers’ concert album Made in America which begins with the Blues Brothers’ All-Star Blues Band (Paul “The Shiv” Shaffer², conductor) playing the tune “Green Onions”, and then continues as Elwood J. Blues (played by Dan Aykroyd³) appears on stage to give the crowd a straight-forward lecture on “How Geopolitical Structures are Affected by Cultural Developments (and the Chrysler 440 Cubic-Inch Engine)” [ED. — not its actual title]. Brilliance and absurdity, all with a chunka-chunka Memphis back-beat! Possibly the finest way that Political Science and Social Geography has ever been presented as part of a rock show. Not there’s much competition,granted… outside of U2 concerts and Press Conferences…

If only I could locate a CD of that album… damn, that record is everything one could want and a long sleep-in the next morning.

So… That’s Canada, in a sense: we all want records made by our countrymen playing music developed from songs sung by African Slaves in the United States of America. Which is a change from having the English singing them [c.f. any recording by The Beatles and the Rolling Stones]

¹ While I did have a rather emotional response to the results, it was with more disappointment than anything else. Our PM, while I may not agree with his policies or management style, bear him no ill will as a person and am certain he loves his wife and children, is a friend to small dogs, etc. I’m certain he and I could have a beer together and discuss things such as the economy and the arts and agree to disagree about the priorities of them both to the nation’s well-being. ‘Live and let live’; ‘I may not agree with what you say, but I’ll fight to the death for your right to say it’; and all that. Except Mr. Harper may have to pick up the tab for the beer, as I’m a struggling Canadian Publishing Entrepreneur and could use some government financial stimulation even if that’s merely an evening of pints.

² Canadian

³ also a Canadian