So in about 24 hours, I’ll be looking at that thing there on the right. And, yes, it does look like some sort of phallic symbol: perhaps a penis with a condom designed by a minimalist (“as long as the ‘working end’ is covered, then the job’s sorted, innit?”). Perhaps something different; more filthy, perhaps.

Anyway, the point is that that’s the Air Traffic Control Tower of Vancouver International Airport. And, no it’s not a joke: we really do have an international one, with more than one runway and all that, just like a real airport. As a matter of fact, there’s four runways (yes, they’re all paved), and a total of 17,495,049 people on 326,026 æroplanes went in and/or out of the terminal for one reason or another, and if you don’t believe me, then go here.

So there!

All of the final matters are done: tickets confirmed for train to and from Warwick; the hotel in Londinium’s King’s Cross area booked (“room comes decorated with modern ‘rusted shopping trolley and discarded condom/hypodermic needle’ motif…”); relevant pages of Lonely Planet book of Britain passed through OCR and proofed for most weirdness (Westminster Abbey doesn’t have ‘electrical’ burial monuments, for instance, preferring “elaborate” ones); PDF copies of passport and other identity papers amassed in folder on lap-top’s hard-drive, along with as much music as I can shoe-horn on there as well; the digital camera’s 2GB memory card is empty and ready for images; extra batteries for the camera and an electrical adaptor for the laptop are ready; etc.

What’s not been done yet is packing.

Yes, really.

I’m doing laundry right now, so I’m getting very, very close to that. Probably most of it will be done tonight, with one last sweep through things tomorrow, ensuring I’ve enough socks, shirts, boxers, a face flannel, that sort of thing.

One must have priorities; mine happen to involve lots of digital media, personal documents, and travel guide pages.

The next you hear from me — should everything co-operate according to plan — will be from the Midlands of the UK and will cover flight plus train journeys.

Let’s hope the first two hours in England goes a tad better on this trip than the first two hours the last trip provided after landing.

Tags: accident, Air Canada, England, flight, travel, Vancouver International Airport, Warwick

While I am determined to kill myself through over-work and lack of inclusion in my schedule of anything resembling ‘fun’, things are at work to potentially increase the distribution of books to the wider world and creation of greater sales figures as a direct result.

It’s very early days yet, however.

Stay tuned.

And I’m heading to the UK in October this year as a direct result of what happened on Day One of last year’s eventful maiden voyage to the Mothership of England. And Her Majesty’s Justice System is paying. Should be interesting.

More on that when things are specific in their details.

Carry on as you see fit in the meantime…

Tags: accident, England, ER, Justice System, UK, Warwick Royal Court, Warwickshire

So, yes, finally, here’s the first twelve hours or so of my trip. More will be covered… when I either get around to it or when the images are up-loaded to the server from the laptop in Spain, whichever comes last (both have to have taken place, you see).

Jennifer drove me to the airport, where I checked in and surrendered my luggage to the gaping maw in the wall behind the desk. We went to a little place in the Food Fair (indicative of the quality of consumables, not the activities there) and had an oddly reasonably priced Greek Salad at a place called Opa! run by Koreans. Silly me, I hadn’t realised that Opa! was a franchise… unless Greece has a huge Korean community of which we were previously un-aware…?

When I left Vancouver it was September the 14^th at around 8:00pm. It was a nice day and looked to be a cloudless evening during sunset.

Later I was to learn that Jennifer had already replaced me with a dinner of perogies followed by mint chocolate ice cream. Nice to know what one is equivalent to: starch and fatty dairy foods.

Whilst travelling on the plane (sorry, no images of the plane… yet) I had a wonderful chat with my seat-mates as they returned to their home, and I travelled to the UK for the first time. I remember some sort of discussion about how Tony Blair was a massive waste of space and was well out of it now.

I watched two movies, neither of which I can remember the names of now. The latest Harry Potter and the new Casino Royale seem likely, but one of those might have been on the way back. Actually, I’m pretty sure the Bond film was, because some American sounding lady ahead of me commented disbelievingly on the fact that James Bond was driving a Ford in Bahamas.

The Fords of North America are not seen in the same light as they are in the UK. At all. For those of you in England, imagine James Bond behind the wheel of an Austin Metro. Not pretty, is it?

Speaking of un-attractive things, I ate on the plane a few times. Not sure why. Something about “pasta”, apparently. I didn’t believe it at the time and refuse to believe that now.

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Tags: A439, accident, England, Gatwick, hire car, M5, motorcycle, VW Jetta, Warwick Road, Warwickshire