Why both? Well, because when you consider them as a pair, you actually want to watch the second one, as opposed to trying to get into the Hellboy world with only the first one to judge from. Originally I hadn’t intended to watch the second, having had the first leave me under-​whelmed. I’m glad I gave the hornèd red guy a second chance, however, as there’s some pretty good stuff going on here. Credits and trailers for both films follow the babbling.

What the first film suffers from in my mind is the same thing any film adaptation of a TV or Comic Book series suffers from: initial introduction of the characters and rules of their world massive information download. Given the complexity of any Fantasy /​Horror /​SF /​Alternate Reality landscape, if you are approaching the making of the film – or book, or whatever – as it being the first of several, the result is that at least the first third of your initial movie – or volume, or whatever – is going to be akin to reading out a set of rules and regulations at the start of the school year. Remember that bit in Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life at the start of the classroom lecture which involved a long list of instructions about things to do if you were getting your haircut, but your older brother’s clothes were already on a lower peg and he wasn’t… Oh never mind, here it is, and watch it until just past the minute mark for what I’m talking about.

Right, got that? That’s my point, you see. Welcoming people into the world of Hellboy or Batman or The X-​Men or The Lord of the Rings or whatever, is – if you’re not careful – just like that. Sadly, it’s also entirely necessary. While not every rule about the world is required straight off, you do need to know, for instance, that Harry Potter has been orphaned and left at the door of someone’s home, and that he’s not entirely a normal boy. That way, when you learn he’s a wizard, then the world of wizardry can be introduced to you the reader of the book or the viewer of the film along with our little lightning-​bolt bearing laddie. This is also the advantage when adapting something in which the ‘rules of the world’ are actually being introduced to someone in the story, along with the readers or watchers.

Hellboy (2004)

The world of Hellboy, however, almost entirely exists before you get there, were it not for the ‘new guy’, John Meyers (played by baby-​faced cuteness Rupert Evans), who is a recent graduate of FBI training supposedly reporting for his first assignment, which is at some place he’s never heard of and neither has the rest of the World (which is how the US Government wants it, thank you very much). Thus, in a sense, he becomes our way into this bizarre land of huge red men who use belt sanders to control the length of their horns the way normal people clip their finger nails.

The problem is that we’re introduced to so damned much here that the actual “doing of stuff” is so limited in opportunity that you really don’t have much foreplay before penetrating the actual adventure story itself. Not only do we first have to understand the initial discovery of Hellboy by the Nazis, we also have to meet his new protector and adoptive father Professor Broom, and the US Army Unit he’s with; plus Rasputin and Ilsa, who have opened-​up a portal to another dimension and awakened forces known as “The Seven Gods of Chaos” on a tiny island off the coast of Scotland (you know, the way the Nazis were always doing); then have some time pass and we meet a much older Professor Broom (John Hurt); plus The Man Now in Charge, Tom Manning; plus a fish-​like guy named Abe Sapien, who is a sort of empath; and then we meet the titular character. But a crisis occurs and we go and save the city. Meanwhile we get Hellboy’s flame Liz Sherman introduced as well, who has her own oddities, and that’s when the story really starts.

So… confused yet?

Honestly, it’s a damned heavy bit of lifting getting into the mythos of this world, especially given 99% of the people we meet in the opening sequence are seemingly erroneous once we’re past the titles, barring their responsibility for Helboy’s existence, and even the one who we do follow suddenly gets 60 years older. Coupled with the fact the opening’s visuals are so explosive and exciting – for most films this would qualify as SFX worthy only for a climax – it’s damned tough to have anything follow it at all. The only way to have gotten around that false climax would have been to get our boy to the secret base right at the start, then meet Professor Broom, chat for a few minutes, and then have Meyers get a briefing told in flash-​back, so that we can have him reacting to the whole thing as we also do. I’m not sure there’s much to be gained through that, although it might seem far to superior to those who prefer things that way. Neither is actually better, it’s simply a matter of preference.

Anyway, Hellboy goes off with Fish-​Guy and the ancient, underground city is ultimately saved after Hellboy gives in to Rasputin demand that Hellboy use his “Right Hand of Doom” to finally free the Seven Gods of Chaos. In other words, it doesn’t get any easier, no. Still, there’s some good action, you get a fair bit of character detail, and the visuals are fantastic.

Hellboy II: The Golden Army (2008)

The second film is far less work, mostly because you’re already up-​to-​speed with who the red guy is, plus his friends and co-​workers. The story in the second film is far easier to follow as a result as well. Being in a far less time-​spanning narrative makes this far more self-​contained. However, the size of the saga is still substantial, involving an albino man (Luke Goss) who turns out to be Elfin Prince Nuada, who wants to get a missing bit of the crown his father King Balor broke apart, plus another bit that his sister, Princess Nuala, has in her possession. He must be stopped from doing this. There’s also a new character brought in: the bossy-​pants Johann Krauss, who is incredibly intelligent and – sadly – he knows it and ensures that everyone else is aware of it as well. The whole pathos /​humour balance is wonderfully accomplished, and kudos to writers Mignolo and del Toro for achieving the perfect mix.

The one sad thing is that we don’t have FBI-​guy John Meyers, which is too bad as he’s the only normal human left in this world, it seems. Apparently actor Rupert Evans was already booked for a run of Kiss of the Spider Woman during the filming period and couldn’t make the shoot in Budapest, London, and County Antrim.

In both films, it’s the visuals that make the stories work. Director Guillermo del Toro has an incredible gift when making fairy tales come to life, and seemingly takes the attitude that ‘less’ isn’t ‘more’, less is less; so let’s have more! The frame is rammed-​full of textures and details for no reason other than “because he can”, and they all work perfectly. Something that often gets short shrift, when a folk tale or super-​hero story gets a film made of it, is that these things aren’t supposed to be peopled with pretty things, but lumpy and ugly stuff! When a set of rocks suddenly leap up and reveal themselves as a gigantic creature, there are oddly-​shaped ovoids that don’t perfectly come together! This is far more disturbing, as the sense of it seeming to be designed by humanity, or controlled by some sort of rational aesthetic, might cause it to seem more ‘normal’. Randomness and anarchy are always disturbing. S. del Toro embraces that, thank goodness; especially when dealing with the world of Nature.

So… oodles of work here for the casual viewer, yes. If you found the first one a bit too impenetrable, it’s understandable, but see the second one and I can guarantee you a better time and a far more entertaining one as well.

Hellboy (2004)
Revolution Studios presents
Lawrence Gordon Productions
Starlite Films
in association with Dark Horse Entertainment

Directed by
Guillermo del Toro

Writing credits
Guillermo del Toro (screenplay)
Guillermo del Toro (screen story) and Peter Briggs (screen story)
Mike Mignola (comic books)

Hellboy II: The Golden Army (2008)
Universal Pictures presents
in association with Dark Horse Entertainment,
Internationale Filmproduktion Eagle,
Lawrence Gordon Productions, and
Mid-Atlantic Films
in association with Relativity Media

Directed by
Guillermo del Toro

Writing credits
Guillermo del Toro (screenplay)
Guillermo del Toro (story) & Mike Mignola (story)
Mike Mignola (comic book)

This year, I’ve been watching DVDs from the library for a number of reasons, mostly to do with a combination of “filling in the gaps in my ‘pop culture’ knowledge”, as well as a concerted effort to better understand story editing by both watching a film and then re-​watching listening to people who have studied that particular movie for years in order to better appreciate the themes, plot construction, symbolism, and so on.

The process would be nothing without the secondary audio tracks. Sometimes it’s like having actually been through the film-​making process with the people involved.

Most of the typical super-​hero movies, or films about people fighting off zombie hordes deal either present some ‘average joe’ shoved into an extraordinary circumstance and achieve great things, or someone with Super Powers who then does the same. This one… well… it’s tough to explain how it mixes the two, except to say that Elvis Presley and President John F. Kennedy fight an ancient Egyptian king who needs to be put to rest after his sarcophagus is mishandled into a Texas river.

Bubba Ho-​Tep (2002)

If you have to read that last part again, do so, as the above is about the most straight-​forward part of the tale. If you haven’t got that grasped firmly, you’ll be lost in the next paragraph for sure.

Elvis is in an old-​age home suffering some sort of cancerous lesion on his penis, and JFK is now an African American living in terror that President Lyndon Johnson is going to locate him in the aforementioned care facility and ‘finish the job’.

Again, the above is insane, so I understand if you need to re-​read that, if you don’t actually have to understand it, as it serves as what is the most far-​fetched ‘MacGuffin’ potentially in the history of fiction. Frankly, you have to accept this in order to get into the story at all, and both characters provide enough explanation of how this can even be possible for anyone. The best thing to say on this topic is simply trust me, it works, and leave it at that. Watch the film if you haven’t already.

The film is based on – actually it owes its entirety to – a novella by Joe R. Lansdale, and nearly all of the dialogue and voice-​over narrative is taken right from the source material. There are, apparently, two small things which were added by the director due to the visual nature of the medium, but nothing was removed for that reason from the original work. If anyone was looking for an example of how to adapt a strong story to the screen this is the best example of it imaginable. The dialogue, action, and plot are clearly told (once you get past the admittedly incredible points above), with the whole thing not only being entertainingly intelligent, it’s down-​right fun to watch.

Hollywood could never have made this movie, as it seems incapable of presuming the audience has the capacity to comprehend the rules of a world in which Egyptian Pharaohs can come to life near a Texas old age home. Certainly, the popularity of this film is destined to be smaller than that of Star Wars or The Fantastic Four, but people said the same thing about The X-​Men, Star Trek, and Doctor Who and look how those have shifted into film legacies!

This particular film is a perfect example of my belief that a strong plot, interesting characters, and a little bit of action are integral to a story. Whatever you do with those – change the timeline, make the characters’ details implausible, mix genre and story styles like a tossed salad – is immaterial as long as you have those three aspects rock-​solid and complete in their development.

The DVD of this has two commentary tracks to accompany the film: one with the director and the actor who plays “Elvis” (Bruce Campbell), and another track with commentary by “The King”. It’s like a whole new movie.

Bubba Ho-Tep (2002)
Silver Sphere Corporation

Director:
Don Coscarelli

Writers:
original novella by Joe R. Lansdale
screenplay by Don Coscarelli

This year, I’ve been watching DVDs from the library for a number of reasons, mostly to do with a combination of “filling in the gaps in my ‘pop culture’ knowledge”, as well as a concerted effort to better understand story editing by both watching a film and then re-​watching listening to people who have studied that particular movie for years in order to better appreciate the themes, plot construction, symbolism, and so on.

The process would be nothing without the secondary audio tracks. Sometimes it’s like having actually been through the film-​making process with the people involved.

When someone writes a damned good novel which shines light upon the heart of humanity in all its best and worst forms, it ought to be left alone for to muck about with it is to destroy perfection. This film is smart and intelligent, and doesn’t make the mistake previously outlined.

The Invisible Man (1933)

Despite the image in the poster, the titular character never once has searchlights behind his spectacles (if you’re hoping for that as a part of the film, better to look elsewhere, such as The Lord of the Rings trilogy with it’s all-​seeing eye of Sauron). This film not only doesn’t have that, it also hasn’t any colour either. It is, however, full to the rim with excellent English actors being fantastic.

The fact you never see the face of the main character until the very last moment of his existence is the principle reason that Boris Karloff chose not to play the role, and thus we get to hear the fabulous tones of Claude Rains instead. Thank goodness director James Whale overhead the latter actor’s screen test by accident. The voice is, quite rightly, far more important than any box-​office name might normally be. The intellectual quality of the scientist who accidentally becomes invisible is key to the story being effective, for it is this which not only permits the formula to be created in the first place, it is what makes the potential of the man’s evil so much the greater.

As my much-​loved fellow film lover John Llewellyn Probert pointed out in his review of Rosemary’s Baby:

Ultimate evil isn’t Dennis Wheatley’s Mocata in a cape, it’s the annoying old couple who live next door, the obstetrician who wants your baby for his own devices, the best friend who kills themselves and leaves you alone again just as you thought you were managing to settle into your strange new environment a tiny bit. It’s the empty corridors that always look as if they’re hiding someone or something threatening around the next corner. It’s those individuals in our society (spouse, neighbour, doctor) that you should be able to trust but you can’t.

http://johnlprobert.blogspot.com/2011/11/rosemarys-baby-1968.html

This is precisely why the scientist must be highly intelligent: only the smartest men can create these things, and thus they are best fitted for the great responsibility which comes with that great power… right?

You see how scary that is suddenly?

Then add the erudite tones of the ‘Oxbridge’ accent to that and it explains a great deal about why all of Bond’s most well-​known arch-​enemies (barring a couple) have upper-​class English accents. Responsibility and power ought to be the ingredients for goodness, not the ingredients for egregious evil!

While the extensive scene at the small road-​house at the outset of the film is important for setting the scene and getting the viewer to know the rules of this situation, it does go on a bit over-​long, with the result that the locals seem to take a hell of a long time to work out what’s going on with the man upstairs – admittedly realistically – and thus end-​up looking very very stupid. The disbelieving officials also get over-​used; which again seems realistic, who would take the word of a bunch of labourers that “there’s an invisible man living above our local!” Again, however, this is a movie and things ought to move along a bit quicker, otherwise Close Encounters of the Third Kind would run eighteen hours (and it’s long enough as it is, thank you).

The rarefied atmosphere of a film allows for things to be accepted more quickly than in real life, which in turn allows the audience to accept things more easily and efficiently as a result. The actors are scared, we are scared. The characters are dancing and making merry, we are dancing and making merry with them. The King of Spain is a man with a large blue hat, and those of us males with a large blue hat are also the King of Spain! You see?

Okay, skip the last one, probably.

To learn just how evil and amoral a scientist might become when reaching for the other tree in the Garden of Evil, have a look at this film. It’s exceedingly well-​made, and moves along quite quickly despite my comments about the first act. You’ll likely be pleasantly surprised with the special effects, too!

The Invisible Man
Universal Pictures (1933)

Directed by
James Whale

Writing credits
H.G. Wells (novel)
R.C. Sherriff (screenplay)
Preston Sturges contributing writer (uncredited)
Philip Wylie (also uncredited)

This year, I’ve been watching DVDs from the library for a number of reasons, mostly to do with a combination of “filling in the gaps in my ‘pop culture’ knowledge”, as well as a concerted effort to better understand story editing by both watching a film and then re-​watching listening to people who have studied that particular movie for years in order to better appreciate the themes, plot construction, symbolism, and so on.

The process would be nothing without the secondary audio tracks. Sometimes it’s like having actually been through the film-​making process with the people involved.

Holy CRAP is this cool! It’s purported to be the first horror film (it being from 1920, and Nosferatu didn’t appear until 1922), and yet there’s so much in place here that it’s stunning that no-​one had done one before. The story form has been around for a long time, but to present one visually and not simply present a stage play on film is another matter entirely.

The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920)

The look of the film is fantastic (and see if you can locate a copy of the Kino-​release with the film tinting), with all sorts of nifty imagery. There’s not a straight line anywhere, due to the “German Expressionist Style” making everything quite anarchic.

The wrap-​around telling of the story either adds an extra level of vagueness to the story – is it madness, is it a dream fantasy, or is it reality – or simply makes you wonder “why did they bother to complicate the thing?” I’ve not made up my mind which camp I’m in.

The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920)

Director:
Robert Wiene

Writers:
Hans Janowitz and Carl Mayer

This year, I’ve been watching DVDs from the library for a number of reasons, mostly to do with a combination of “filling in the gaps in my ‘pop culture’ knowledge”, as well as a concerted effort to better understand story editing by both watching a film and then re-​watching listening to people who have studied that particular movie for years in order to better appreciate the themes, plot construction, symbolism, and so on.

The process would be nothing without the secondary audio tracks. Sometimes it’s like having actually been through the film-​making process with the people involved.